Tuesday, August 26, 2008

coming to a close

my journal entry from this morning

It is nice out today! I've said it four times already- but today, while I stand out on the balcony, it feels like I'm at the beach! Yes, very random, I know. Because I couldn't be more smack dab in the middle of a desert. But the sunshine, the strong cool wind, yes, if I close my eyes I can go there. I feel like I am sitting on the edge of a giant ocean. I will let my mind transform the unending traffic below into beautiful crashing waves! Oh, here come the waves now. Some waves are noisier than others, but they sure do fly by! As much as I try, I can not seem to transform that man's voice. Yes that one that trills and tramples all over my beach dream. There are no calls to prayer in my beach get away. Well perhaps he could be the lifeguards calling out their safety warnings? Nope, not working for me. The call to prayer brings me back to the very clear fact- I am nowhere near a beach. But, I will be soon!

We are counting down the days- we have two more days at our little Arab summer home. It's hard to believe it's time to go home. I have loved this place. I have felt so very comfortable, safe, relaxed, creative, and in touch with a new voice inside me. Maybe I learned something along this crazy journey of ours, maybe I didn't. And I love that I can say that. Because my first reaction tells me that I need to share something significant... that I need to prove myself and prove the reason for this journey. But I quickly realize that I'm only trying to find my own significance in the process. Maybe, this is all I needed to learn. That I can honestly say "Maybe we learned something, maybe we didn't learn anything- but I'm okay with that, because we had the greatest time!" Like I've said many times along this journey- "This trip isn't necessarily about accomplishing something, it's just something that needs to be accomplished." Or how I described it in Santorini to Joe, "This journey has always been on my recipe card of life. It was always something that was intended and necessary for the full makings of my life." Ahhh, with a deep breath and a true smile to self- I am thankful. Life feels so full today.

5 comments:

Kelli said...

There is no limit to the importance of accomplishing lifelong dreams. I am proud of you for being an example of doing just that! So many of us never really try to go after our bigger dreams because it would be too hard, or we're afraid of what people would think of us (okay, I shouldn't be speaking for anyone else but myself here - I'll start writing in the first person) but you guys have cahllenged me to at least believe that some of the things I want to accompish are possible and, within reason, I should go after them! So thanks. And I'm glad you've had fun!

Whimsique said...

What you have shared has had so much significance,even if it doesn't feel like it. The things you learned, and shared and experienced are shaping who you guys are, and that my friend is significant. I absolutely cannot wait to see you both. Enjoy the Alps, they are a beautiful sight. :)

anjuli paschall said...

I love what you said about accomplishing something. you said it perfectly. love you and can't wait for you to come home.

Ms Moneyone said...

Beautifully said. Love you and can't wait to see you.

Anonymous said...

I have enjoyed following your journey very much! Has brought me many memories of our journey together 10 years ago. And you said it exactly right...maybe you learned something, maybe you didn't. But, you'll never be the same because of it!

Safe travels as you return home!

xoxox, Paige